


burn away the broken lies (that i still believe)

by just_another_outcast



Category: Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Blink and you'll miss it, Christian Themes, Fear, Found Family, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Self-Doubt, it's narnia though so that's pretty much assumed, super vague though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:33:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27217963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_another_outcast/pseuds/just_another_outcast
Summary: In which Edmund isn't the only one to think of his fears when Lord Rhoop tells them not to. But even after the fears are dealt with and the day is saved, Edmund and Lucy need to set the record straight and remind Caspian of who exactly made him king, and why.
Relationships: Caspian & Edmund Pevensie, Caspian & Lucy Pevensie
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	burn away the broken lies (that i still believe)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JustAnotherWriter (N1ghtshade)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/N1ghtshade/gifts).



> This is by no means my best work, just something that gripped me after rewatching the Narnia movies the other week and wouldn't let go until I wrote it. Heather and I also agreed to write a Narnia fic for each other lol so this is for her XD I have never written these characters before in my life, but I hope it doesn't suck too much lol. The title comes from the song Cauterize by Red, but the songs Fear Is a Liar by Zach Williams and The Voice of Truth by Casting Crowns also provided a lot of inspiration for this piece. I hope you enjoy, and please leave a review :)

Later, Caspian would reflect on how utterly preposterous it was to instruct people not to think of a specific thing. That was the only surefire way to make them think of that very specific thing that they had just been instructed not to think about it. If you wanted people to not think about something, the best way to go about it would be to not mention anything at all. Thoughts are unruly things, and they cannot be tamed.

But in the moment, all Caspian could think about was how utterly screwed they all were, and it was his fault - well, his and Edmund's, based on the look of horror on his face.

"Oh, no, I'm so sorry," Edmund said, then rushed over to the railing.

"Edmund, what did you just think of?" Lucy asked as she ran over to him.

Caspian knew he should be concerned about whatever it was that Edmund had just inadvertently cursed them all with, but he was too busy staring out into the crowd of nervous sailors, watching as his dead uncle walked among them. No one but Caspian had seemed to notice him yet, but they would soon enough.

The ship lurched to the side, throwing Caspian off balance for a moment. He got to the rail and looked over the edge, his heart plummeting to his stomach at the sight of a sea serpent. So not only had he thought of his murderous uncle, someone who wouldn't hesitate to kill any of them, but Edmund had thought of the one thing that Caspian had told Drinian not to bring up all those weeks earlier. Maybe he really had made a mistake in bringing them there.

In the back of his mind, Caspian could hear the crewmen shouting in panic, but he was too focused on Miraz, who was standing among them, staring straight at Caspian with murder in his eyes. Someone ran in front of him, and the next moment, his uncle was gone. Caspian looked around wildly for the man until a hand landed on his arm, startling him into the physical.

"Your Majesty," Drinian said, looking at him with concern that he was unlikely to voice. "What are you orders, sir?"

He was saved from having to reply by the roar of a dragon, who had Lord Rhoop's sword sticking out of his shoulder. Everyone was screaming, maybe Caspian was too, as Eustace flew away, leaving them without the very valuable aid of a dragon against the sea serpent. They needed to get out, to get away, that was their only chance.

"Turn the ship about!" he shouted to Drinian, who took the order and ran with it.

"Crew! To your rowing positions! Oars at double speed!" the captain shouted.

The serpent breached the water with an earsplitting screech, then dove across the ship, wrapping itself around it and crushing the rails. Caspian pushed Lucy and Gael towards the stern, urging them below deck. He knew Lucy wouldn't stay there, the girl was far too headstrong for that, but at least Gael would be safe.

Caspian turned his attention back to the deck as the crew rushed about, looking for the man who murdered his father, but even from his position at the helm, he couldn't spot the man. Maybe he was gone. Perhaps Caspian had imagined him there, and it was only Edmund's fear that had materialized. Either way, a sea serpent was a more pressing concern than one man, even if that one man had played the starring role in Caspian's nightmares for far longer than anyone knew.

A stony outcropping caught his attention. They could try to impale the serpent on it. That could work.

"Ed! Ed!" he shouted, catching the other king's attention. "We'll ram the serpent, smash him on the rocks," he said, nodding towards the outcropping.

"Steer her to port, I'll keep it on the prow!" Edmund shouted back before dashing off.

Caspian tried to ignore his heart hammering away in his ribcage and the fear in the back of his mind that Miraz was just around the corner, biding his time to strike and take back the throne. It was illogical. If Miraz really was there, as a corporeal being, then he needed to protect himself from the sea serpent just as much as everyone else did. Caspian needed to focus on the serpent first, then any other threats that may have been created by the dark magic.

The serpent was on the prow, hissing and snapping at the figurehead, where Edmund was directing it with his beam of light. Caspian kept the ship steady, heading straight towards the rocks. The serpent's hiss, echoing throughout the cavern, was the only warning before it struck, latching it's jaw around the figurehead, where Edmund was taunting it.

"Edmund!" he cried out in time with Lucy, despite knowing that the king wouldn't be able to hear them over the cacophony of all the sailors' screams. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding as he saw Edmund scurry onto the top of what was left of the figurehead, alive and well. Caspian turned the ship back on track to the rocks, the serpent directly between them. He ignored the shiver that went down his spine as he spotted his uncle once again, staring up at him from the main deck, paying no mind to the chaos around him. Was Miraz even real? Was the dark magic simply playing tricks on his mind, making him see things that weren't there? Caspian shook his head. Either way, the serpent certainly was real, and it was the serpent that was the greatest threat.

He could just make out an arrow flying through the air and striking the serpent in the eye, providing the distraction they needed to keep the serpent exactly where it was. The hit was coming.

"Brace yourselves!" he shouted just before the ship slammed into the rocks, the serpent crushed between them. Edmund fell from the figurehead, bouncing off the part of the serpent still wrapped around the ship, and onto the main deck. Caspian rushed down to him as the ship buoyed back and away from the rocks, but the serpent seemed only angered. Something in it was glowing. Caspian and Edmund watched as a seam opened up down the middle of the serpent's body, releasing a hundred little arms like a centipede. The serpent reared back and roared. "Move!" Caspian shouted before bodily shoving Edmund to the side.

They tumbled to the ground, but avoided getting their heads bitten off. Caspian grabbed his sword and struck one of the many arms of the serpent, watching as the severed limb faded into green mist. It wasn't real. None of it was real. It could hurt them, even kill them, but it wasn't actually real, merely a thing created by dark magic. That meant that Miraz wasn't real either. No matter what he saw, his uncle truly was dead. Whatever thing he saw was a dark magic apparition, playing on his fear of the man. They could kill the sea serpent, and they could kill Miraz too.

"We can beat this," he said, looking back over at Edmund. The serpent began attacking the masts, tearing the sails and devouring the crows nest.

"We have to get it closer," Edmund said, stepping away.

"All hands to the main deck!" Drinian ordered, getting the terrified sailors back in line.

"Ready the harpoons!" Caspian added. That was their only chance. The sailors around him did as he commanded, though they shook with fear. Caspian stared up at the monster as Edmund taunted it once again. "Ready!" he called out. A cacophony of "aye sir" answered him. "Now!" he shouted, spurring them on to launch the harpoons at the beast. The sea serpent screeched as its hide was pierced by the blades. The harpoons held strong as Caspian and his men began to pull.

"Pull its head down!" he ordered. The crew immediately did as he commanded, all coming together and taking hold of the ropes. Caspian held the tail end of one, working with his crew to pull the serpent into position for Edmund to kill it.

The wind was knocked out of him as something collided into him, knocking Caspian to the ground and wrapping hands around his throat. All his wide eyes could focus on was his attacker: Miraz. Caspian wrapped his legs around his uncle's waist and bucked him off, giving Caspian just a moment to catch his breath. He sucked in gasping lungfuls of air as he drew his sword. The sea serpent continued to roar above him, but Caspian didn't dare take his eyes off Miraz. He could see several crewmembers looking over with wide eyes as they continued to pull the serpent down, but he couldn't focus on them. It had taken Miraz a few minutes - it had only been a few minutes since the sea serpent had appeared - to be able to corner Caspian, with all of the chaos onboard, and finally he had his chance.

"You're not a king," Miraz practically growled at him. "You're barely even a man."

"And you're not real," Caspian shot back. "You're dead."

The serpent roared above them, stealing both of their attention's for a moment. Caspian could see Rhindon glowing blue as the serpent fell back into the ocean with a splash, but he didn't have time to dwell on it. Miraz grabbed a sword from the deck and charged his nephew with a battle cry. Caspian parried with the skill of someone who'd done it a thousand times. The sky began to turn clear above them, the cavern created by the dark magic turning into mist around them and fading away, yet Miraz remained.

The crew stood by as Caspian and Miraz matched each other blow for blow, watching with wide eyes that Caspian didn't care to discern the meaning behind. He wanted to seek out Edmund and Lucy, but was afraid of what he would find in their gazes. Would they be disappointed in him? Caspian was king, he'd won wars and helped his kingdom to grow strong. He wasn't supposed to be holding onto fear of his uncle, especially when that uncle was three years deceased.

Caspian parried again and stepped away, putting more distance between the two of them.

"I say the word, and you die," Caspian said between breaths of exertion. He motioned to his crew, who were standing at the ready with their own weapons, needing only the order to defend their king. The ship was surrounded by clear waters and blue sky. There was nowhere for Miraz to go. He wasn't truly real, just something created by the curse acting upon Caspian's fear, but he still needed to be dealt with, just as the sea serpent had been. Caspian needed to kill him, then all traces of the dark magic would be gone.

"You're just as much of a coward now as you've always been," Miraz seethed, though he shot Edmund a sardonic smile. "Unfit to be king, just like your miserable father," he continued as the two stalked around each other. It was far too similar to the duel between Miraz and Peter, only this time, it would be to the death.

"It was mercy that stayed my blade and let you live," Caspian said. "That will not be the case this time. Whatever you are, you're not my uncle, and you know that." This thing in front of him, created by fear, was simply that: a thing. The real Miraz had been dead for three years. What stood in front of him was green mist held together by the last remnants of dark magic, wearing the face of Caspian's fear, and fear was nothing but a liar.

"It makes no difference. You're afraid all the same," Miraz replied.

Caspian lunged back at Miraz in lieu of a response. This needed to end. He was going to end it. Their blades clashed and clanged together, the only sound to be heard on deck. The crew stood back in silence, holding their breaths, knowing that this battle was for the king, and the king alone. Out of the corner of his eye, Caspian could see Lucy holding Edmund back, but fear was reflected in her eyes as well.

He let Miraz get close, much closer than he really wanted to, and let out a sharp cry of pain as Miraz's blade sliced his ribs, right underneath his armor. The wound did burn like fire, but Caspian played it up even more to get Miraz closer. His uncle let out that same low chuckle that never failed to send shivers down Caspian's spine. The man thought he had an opening for victory, but his perceived chance was his distraction, and that was all that Caspian needed. With their proximity, Miraz swung again, only for Caspian to stick his own blade right through the man's stomach, down to the hilt.

Miraz choked, his head falling onto Caspian's chest as he grew weaker.

"I'm not afraid of you," Caspian said, right into the man's ear, before withdrawing his blade and watching Miraz fall to the ground. Not a moment later, he began to turn into quickly fading green mist, just as the serpent had. It was over.

Caspian stumbled back a few steps, taking in shuddering breaths. He had won, but his entire crew had seen that he was still afraid of his uncle. What would they think of a king who held that fear? He was barely old enough to be king anyway, that much was true. He shook his head. Nothing could be done about it either way, and there were more important things to attend to, such as the shouting coming from the water.

There were several boats, full of people. They were the ones taken by the green mist. At least they had found them. Caspian had done that right.

"Let's have them on board," he ordered, making his voice more stern than he normally would. The crew still gave him odd looks, which he patently ignored. Still, they followed his orders, and Caspian couldn't help but grin as Rhince and Gael jumped into the water in their excitement to see Helaine. At least one family was reunited.

He backed away, giving the crew room to work, but Lucy came up to him with a gentle smile. She was holding her healing cordial.

"Will you let me help you?" she asked him.

"It's nothing, truly," Caspian quickly replied, despite the bloody stain that was still growing. He was saved from her aid for another moment, thanks to none other than Eustace.

"Lucy!" he called out from the water, fully human once again.

Caspian backed away as Reepicheep dove into the water with him. They were all so happy, smiling and laughing. It was wonderful, but Caspian couldn't join them just yet. He took in a deep breath after closing the door to his quarters - which he had given to Lucy, but he was sure she wouldn't mind.

What was he supposed to do? Just pretend that none of it had happened, that he wasn't terrified of Miraz and the crew didn't all see that? The doubts about himself that constantly whispered in his mind were roaring, making it difficult to focus on Aslan's roar instead. Deep down, he knew Aslan's roar was the only one that mattered, but it was hard to remember that when Miraz's voice still echoed in his ears.

A gentle knock at the door stole his attention, but the door gently opened before he could even respond. It was definitely Lucy and Edmund. No one else would be so bold with the king.

"This time, will you let me help you?" Lucy asked again with a grin. She held out her cordial to him, motioning for him to take it.

"It's easier if you just do it," Edmund said in the tone of someone who had personal experience. He closed the door behind him, leaving only the three of them in the room. Caspian finally acquiesced, and took the cordial from Lucy's outstretched hand.

"Just a drop is all that's necessary," Lucy added, smiling wide. Caspian did as she said, and a moment later, the pain in his side was gone. He lifted up the edge of his shirt, and although blood still stained his skin, the only evidence of any wound was a completely healed scar. He knew it would work, since what was from Aslan always worked, but Caspian was still surprised by its effectiveness.

"I know, it's weird," Edmund said with a smile as he relaxed into the chair.

The three of them fell into an awkward silence. That was wrong, nothing between them had ever been awkward. It was if there were a barrier between them now, and Caspian knew that the barrier was of his own making.

"Is everyone alright?" he asked them, arms crossed.

"Yes," Lucy immediately replied. "Drinian and Reepicheep are getting them all settled, and Eustace has changed much for the better."

"Which was sorely needed," Edmund added with a scoff. Caspian offered a weak smile, but it quickly fell away.

"Are you alright?" Lucy asked him. She ducked her head a bit to catch his gaze, but Caspian turned away. He carefully took off his armor and set it back in its place in the small wardrobe.

"I'm fine," he said. Facing away from them, he couldn't help but roll his eyes at how unconvincing he sounded. He didn't even believe himself. Caspian grabbed a clean shirt from the wardrobe, and, once Lucy had turned away, took off the one he was wearing, stained with blood as it was. He got another look at his new scar, still amazed to see just how healed it was.

"We all know that's not true," Edmund said after a moment. Caspian turned around after releasing the hair he'd tied back.

"Does it matter?" he asked with a shrug. "There's nothing to be done about it. It's over. They all know their king is afraid of his dead uncle." He flashed a sardonic smile before shaking his head.

"Who wouldn't be?" Lucy asked in reply. She stood up and walked closer to him. "After everything he did..." she trailed off for a moment before continuing. "That sort of thing doesn't just go away."

"You don't even know everything he did," Caspian muttered, looking down. "How does it look for a king to have such blatant fears? I already have to prove to them that I'm not too young or too Telmarine to be king. This will only make things worse."

"Your people love you," Lucy insisted. She took his hands in her smaller ones as she looked up at him. "And you forget that when we were made kings and queens, we were even younger than you were at your coronation."

"You had just defeated the White Witch, you had their trust and their respect despite your age," Caspian retorted, pulling his hands away from her and crossing his arms defensively once again. The situations just weren't the same.

"But we almost didn't," Edmund interjected. "Because of me. But Aslan saw more than that in me, and because of Him, the rest of Narnia did too. The only reason it was a sea serpent that I thought of first today instead of the White Witch was because Drinian has kept talking about them. But I'm still scared of her too, and she's just as dead as Miraz. You're not any lesser of a king because of it."

"Aslan sees who we really are," Lucy said with a smile that lit up her face - which was much more beautiful than she gave herself credit for. "He knows all. He said you were ready to be king, even knowing your fears. If Aslan says that you will be a great king, then a great king you will be. Or are you about to doubt Aslan?" she asked him, smirking.

"He saw me as a great king, despite what I'd done. Don't you know that He still sees you as a great king too?" Edmund asked him.

Caspian couldn't exactly argue with them. Aslan knew best, that was certain. He couldn't argue against Aslan, no matter how he felt.

"All of Narnia knows that Aslan chose you," Lucy added. "If anything, they'll just see you as more human now, instead of just a king, and that's a good thing. They need to see that you're like them."

"I know there's a voice in your head that's telling you otherwise, but they will see you as stronger." Edmund stood from his seat as he stressed his words. "It's not every day that someone gets a chance to do physical battle with their fear and come out on top," he said with a smile. "They see their king who faced it and won, nothing else."

After a moment, Caspian gave a small nod. Maybe they were right. Maybe he was letting his anxiety rule over logic.

"Perhaps I've been too hard on myself," he muttered, not willing to fully concede and let them win, but recognizing that he wasn't exactly right.

"Just perhaps," Edmund added sarcastically with a clap against Caspian's shoulder and a smile.

"Come on," Lucy said, motioning towards the door. "Reepicheep wants to see Aslan's Country, and it's clear we're almost there."

"Who am I to deny Reepicheep?" Caspian said, his smile the first real one since arriving at the cavernous dark island.

Edmund slung his arm around Caspian's shoulders and began to pull him out of the cabin and back on deck. He took note of the smiles on the crew's faces and the nods they sent his way. No one looked at him in any negative way, or in any way that spoke of anything other than respect.

Maybe Edmund and Lucy had been right. Those lies and whispers he'd heard from Miraz his entire life still echoed in the back of his mind, but the voice of Aslan was just a little bit louder, and the voice of Aslan was always right.


End file.
